I've always known what I am. Besides-- I like myself just fine that way, and I don't really feel like changing it, even if some little freak lizard disagrees.
Then I guess you think like they do. They were saying some of the same things, like... whether there's a hard limit to what someone can have done and still get redeemed, or whether having complicated circumstances changes that limit.
All this to say... if there's anything I can do to help you, Wiš'adel, please let me know. I want you to return to life, but I don't want you to have to sacrifice being you either.
I wanted to be loved. I thought I'd try to find someone to love me, but I gave up after a while. [ after all the heartbreak, and he's still given up. hence not looking for dates ]
And... I don't know if that's reason enough for me to try again.
Otherwise, I've fulfilled my family's responsibility and get to accomplish more here than I did on my island... so I don't know if I want to go back.
All right, what is it? Secret serial killer past? Some other heinous crime you pulled off by looking like some sweet, innocent guy? It'd have to be something like that, right?
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Do you think that you don't...?
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Because I... don't like the idea of people feeling like they have to be 'better' either.
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I've never been a 'good person'. Being dead for a couple months isn't likely to change that.
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It's not fair to judge by a simple measure when life is anything but.
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If someone's lived a truly horrible life with difficult circumstances and making decisions that others might not like is the only way to survive...
How can they be held to the same level as someone who had an easier time...?
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[ it'd be nice but ]
All this to say... if there's anything I can do to help you, Wiš'adel, please let me know. I want you to return to life, but I don't want you to have to sacrifice being you either.
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[she exhales a huff, with that. worry less about her!]
It's not like I was going to live a long life anyway, if I don't get to give it another shot.
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And I feel like... people who are more attached to life than I am should get a better shot.
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I died in a battle that I chose to die in, because it was the best way to accomplish my goals. So I killed my friend and he killed me.
But even before that... I've lost pretty much everyone that I've considered a friend. So... it's a little hard to convince myself to go back.
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I'm going to give you an answer and I think you're going to say it's gross...
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Fine! Hit me with it anyway!
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I wanted to be loved. I thought I'd try to find someone to love me, but I gave up after a while. [ after all the heartbreak, and he's still given up. hence not looking for dates ]
And... I don't know if that's reason enough for me to try again.
Otherwise, I've fulfilled my family's responsibility and get to accomplish more here than I did on my island... so I don't know if I want to go back.
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[what in the fuck.]
I never thought I'd hear you say something that sad.
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I was lucky enough to receive platonic love, from a few people. Though they're mostly gone now.
But... no. People thought they could love me romantically, and it ended up... not working out.
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An abnormal scar that made people think that I'm a puppet of Death, cursed and certainly doomed to harm them.
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he laughs a bit ]
I think... they're probably just all doing their best, and don't know how to wrestle with what they don't understand.
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[it's stupid.]
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[ but... he does appreciate it ]
... thanks for saying so anyway.
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